ANNE LAMOTT: “Perfectionism is the voice of the oppressor, the enemy of the people. It will keep you cramped and insane your whole life, and it is the main obstacle between you and a shitty first draft.”
Here is my shitty first draft about why I am teaching the workshop, Set Boundaries with Compassion and Love: A Workshop for Loved Ones of People Struggling with Addiction in the classroom of my office. I say that everyone is affected in some way by addiction. I have so much to say about this topic that it is difficult to know where to begin. I am committed to writing and talking openly about addiction because I want to make it seen as what it is- a DISEASE that affects so many people and families. People lose their lives, people live in DEEP DENIAL, sometimes for lifetimes, without seeing the full effects of the disease.
When we have parents, loved ones, spouses, friends, siblings, children, bosses, co-workers who struggle with addiction or are in recovery, it often can cause people to live patterns of control and perfectionism, trying to fix everyone and everything around them, without looking at themselves and seeing what they can do to heal themselves. This was me 10 years ago and I am on a path of recovery and healing since I started to see how addiction was affecting my life. I will continue to share some of my story and help support (through classes and private Reiki sessions) those whose lives are turned upside down (even if they don’t realize it) from the disease. I am here to share the tools that help me transform my life into one without as much anxiety, fear, upset, control, and migraines; a life I love and am actively creating, using amazing tools and practices gleaned over the years.
Many times when I share that I have been working on my healing around the effects of people in my life dealing with addiction to friends who are themselves affected by the disease, they resist seeking help around this taboo, secret disease that not a lot of people talk about (hence why it has taken me so long to share). Alcoholism and addiction can cause a lot of bad things to happen in life, and it can be hard to face all the residual effects. Admitting we are affected by the disease of addiction does not mean that we are trying to fix or that we are “doing something” for the addict in our lives… it is admitting we need help and support too (and it does cause a ripple effect of benefiting the person struggling with addiction!)
The workshop I am teaching is all about and for the person who loves (though there might be a lot of anger, resentment & denial) the person struggling. My workshop offers a new perspective, awareness, and simple usable tools so that YOU can be healthier and more aware of your energy/body/mind/spirit even if someone in your life is still affected by addiction.